Swimming in a Sea of Death: A Son's Memoir: David Rieff

Susan Sontag was a gifted and outspoken writer who lived everyday to the fullest extent. Having survived two previous bouts with cancer, both breast and uterine, she was fully aware of the value of life. Sontag was also deeply afraid of death. When she was diagnosed with myelodysplastic syndrome in early 2004 at the age of 71 she couldn't accept the fact that she would very likely die. Swimming in a Sea of Death

Rieff's tribute is very stark in both words and images. He paints a picture of the writer as only he could have seen her, much of the time struggling with despair and yet hungry for new experiences. He writes of her inability to accept defeat, even after it became apparent that her last resort, a bone marrow transplant, had not worked. He lays out his own guilt and complicity without embarrassment. Never once did he try to make her accept the fact that she was going to die. Rieff and those closest to her agreed with her delusions and belief that she would recover again like she had the other times. This blind agreement left him with a large measure of guilt after the disease finally killed her. It also left confusion, as if he shouldn't feel guilty for letting her die as she wanted.

There is very little in the way of comfort or solace in this small book. It seems more a catharsis for the author’s soul then anything else. It isn't necessarily something that one can put a "good" or "bad" tag to as it is very simply his view during the months just before and after her death. It may be however that some will find a small measure of comfort; those that have experienced or are experiencing the same thing. The guilt that survivors often feel at not being able to do or say more then they already have is a palpable thing and can only be understood by someone who has indeed been to swim in that sea of death.

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Hardcover: 192 pages
Publisher: Simon & Schuster; 1 edition (January 8, 2008)
ISBN-10: 0743299469
ISBN-13: 978-0743299466